I am sorry, that I interrupt you, but, in my opinion, this theme is not so actual.
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Deeper Dating integrates the best of human intimacy theory with timeless spiritual truths and translates them into a practical, step-by-step process.
Deeper Dating book. Read 19 reviews from the world's largest community for readers. Among the best manuals for succeeding in finding and keeping love we. .
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Community Reviews. Showing Rating details. More filters. Sort order. At the turn of this year, I finally felt the longing for a meaningful relationship. I decided to pursue that with all my intention.
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But of course, life takes your plans and twists them in unexpected ways. After a recent breakup, brief but potent, I chose self reflection. Oddly enough, it was the wisdom that I learned from the man who no longer wanted a romantic relationship with me that sparked my new quest.
He pointed me to a popular self help blog, Marc and Angel Hack Life. Confused and angry, I nonetheless devoured that blog. I read the book that the authors had written.
Then I was brought back to Ken Page. My former therapist a few years ago when I was struggling with coming out and embracing my emotions, Ken came back into my life in the form of a social media post promoting his new book.
And I was stunned. Deeper Dating helps one understand that in order to find love, we must tap into our own source of love.
We must find, appreciate, and honor our core gifts. We must connect with our source of love. I've read Deeper Dating and I have adopted the core principles into my life.
The micro meditations described in the book are truly astounding, and difficult as they help you access deep parts of your core. If you seriously want to get in touch with yourself, discover your source of love, and improve all your relationships, then this book is a must read. I am ever thankful to Ken for his work just as I am for my former love interest. Sometimes, the greatest lessons come from great pain.
In a brief period of time, I've understood myself better than I have for most of my life. I have begun to treat myself with affection, honor, and trust. I have begun to reframe my relationships with people in the context of my core gift of affection and the need for deeper connections.
And I have begun to seek love interests based on positive attractions of inspiration. If any of this rings true for you, I implore you to give Deeper Dating serious consideration.
Jan 19, Vijay Pande rated it it was amazing. Surprisingly thoughtful, especially in its analysis of understanding when you're dating someone who's addicted to the chase vs is ready and not scared off to be truly close with someone who's ready to move forward as well.
In particular, the exercises for identifying each type as well as how to come to peace with the fact that healthy relationships may in contrast look "boring" and one may even feel some apparent gap in attraction when in fact what's missing is the drama.
I wish I read this ye Surprisingly thoughtful, especially in its analysis of understanding when you're dating someone who's addicted to the chase vs is ready and not scared off to be truly close with someone who's ready to move forward as well.
I wish I read this years ago -- I would have done a much better job of identifying these patterns in myself and the people I've been dating as well as how to move past the drama into something much more healthy and intimate. I highly recommend this book for those who are trying to find meaningful love relationships. There are lots of insights that did not occur to me and I have read quite a few self-help books.
This book teaches you to be kind to yourself and others.
Jun 19, Byurakn rated it it was ok. View all 3 comments. Sep 12, Jilles rated it really liked it.
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Great book about relationships and embracing the shadowparts of you that are part of your Core Gifts that will hekp you attract the right person for you.
Oct 11, April rated it it was amazing. This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
This is a beautiful, soulful book that has given me deeper perspective about myself, not only for romantic relationships, but for all my relationships. In fact, when I wasn't focused on dating, I forgot that this book was trying to help me find a partner. I just felt like it was helping me learn to live a fuller life.
And that is part of the way to find a wonderful partner, for sure! The journaling exercises are helpful too, but I didn't have a learning partner and I think having one could be ex This is a beautiful, soulful book that has given me deeper perspective about myself, not only for romantic relationships, but for all my relationships. The journaling exercises are helpful too, but I didn't have a learning partner and I think having one could be extremely beneficial and enhance the experience of working through this book.
They are simply your points of deepest sensitivity to life. You will find them in the things that inspire you most, the things that touch you most deeply--and in the things that hurt you the most. Often we think we need to conceal these vulnerable parts of ourselves, to hide them or fix them in order to make ourselves more attractive, but the absolute reverse is true: they are the bullet train to authentic intimacy.
When we learn to lead with our core Gifts, our lives shift on their very axes. Our personal magnetism becomes stronger. We experience more passion and more connection to ourselves and others. Most important, we move closer to the love that may have previously eluded us, a love that empowers us and brings us joy.
And why did available, kind, thoughtful people make me want to run for the hills?
This book is a little bit different from regular dating book. It does Stacey's Reviews > Deeper Dating: How to Drop the Games of Seduction and. Full of good learning points and exercises and suggestions to help the reader, but not a quick and easy read. I found myself reading 20 pages. The most helpful chapters to me here were the ones on the attractions of inspiration and deprivation because they honestly helped me learn.
Why did the ones I wanted most never want me back, while those who pursued me barely interested me at all?
At some point along the way, this endless cycle of hope and disappointment hit me right between the eyes. I realized that I had spent years seeking love, but never working to build it.
Books by Ken Page
I disagree. Longing for love is not weakness. It's wisdom. Numbing our loneliness is a path to a despair that plagues our entire culture. We are not meant to be alone and self-sufficient. Without lives filled with love, we wither inside. Intimacy is oxygen. We don't need to transcend our hunger for love--we need to honor it.
Yet they are also the places from which we love most fully. There is a formula that I've seen proven true in my work and my life: to the degree that we treasure our Core Gifts yes, treasure them; dispassionate acceptance isn't enough we attract caring, thoughtful people who are also miracle of miracles attracted to us.
And, equally amazing, we become more attracted to people who are good for us, and less interested in people who diminish us or leave us feeling insecure. I grew up in a family of Holocaust survivors. In their eyes, too much tenderness translated into weakness, and weakness led to death.
So I grew up with a powerful wall of shame and anger around this central attribute of my being. And that wall stopped me from finding any lasting romantic relationship.
But they can scare us. It takes work to learn to handle their complexity, vulnerability, and power. As worthy as our gifts are, they are by no means hall passes to happiess They get us into trouble again and again. We become most defensive, or most naive, around them. They challenge us and the poeple we care about. They ask more of us than we want to give. And we can be devastated when we feel them betrayed or rejected.
Each step we take away from the center of the circle represents a more airbrushed version of ourselves. Each zone outward makes us feel safe, puts us at less risk of embarrassment, failure, and rejection. Yet each zone outward also moves us one step further from our soul, our authenticity, and our sense of meaning. As we get further away from our Core Gifts, we feel more and more alone and adrift. When we get too far from the warmth and humanity of our deepest self, we begin to experience a very painful sense of emptiness and despair.
The more you live in your Gift Zone and act on its promptings, the more love you will have in your life--and the closer you will come to your future relationship. In this zone your unique magic comes alive and begins to influence your world. We all have a suspension bridge inside us that we can visit anytime we wish: it is the scary challenge of authenticity.
If we seek deeper intimacy in our lives, each of us must face inward to the challenge of our authentic self. Your song, should you be brave enough to sing it, will attract people who are searching for someone like you. As you live from your Gift Zone, you will meet people you wouldn't have met. You will create things in the world.
You will inspire people. You will feel strange and scared at times, but you will be claiming new ground of personal goodness, ground that others will want to stand on--I promise you. When you live in your Gift Zone, you will shine. Many people won't notice--and they don't have to.
The people who have been hungry for a person like you will feel thankful that they have finally found you. When you feel inspiration, validation, and acceptance around them, you'll shine. They are the ache, the compelling pull, the inner reaching that we sometimes honor and sometimes try to silence. They are the music that keeps playing below the surface of our minds. To acknowledge our Core Gifts is to create deeper intimacy with our most essential self.
They are so basic to our inner life that it's hard for us to believe everyone doesn't have the same gifts.
Ken Page has 16 books on Goodreads with ratings. Ken Page's most popular book is Deeper Dating: How to Drop the Games of Seduction and Discover. Ken Page is the author of Deeper Dating ( avg rating, ratings, 19 reviews , published ), The Way It Works ( avg rating, 3 ratings, 1 revie. This book was a total gamechanger for me, seriously -- I've already evangelized it to ~10 friends who are reading it. Ken Page takes an.
This can get us into a lot of trouble, because we expect everyone to hold the same values and sensitivities as we do, and when they don't meet the standards we set for ourselves--and don't even seem to care--we assume that it's because there's something wrong with us.
Rather, it's simply a matter of realizing that our gifts are deeply unique, and that not everyone shares our sensitivities. The kind of person you're seeking is someone who is drawn to your Core Gifts, your authentic self. If you wait until you know someone loves you before you reveal these parts of yourself, it's as though you're waiting for the harvest without planting the seeds.
It's the vulnerability, warmth, and humanity of your gifts that will make the right person notice and come to love you. In actuality, there is a great cultural discomfort with joy, and our voracious pleasure seeking is often a mask for our fear of simple joy.
Joy frightens us, it makes our defenses quake--it almost invites a superstitious fear of 'the other shoe dropping. If I hadn't coached him in how to honor the almost unbearable burden of his gift, he would have felt ashamed of the depth of his love. Now, he could at least honor himself as he grieved, and that honoring helped him find his own path to healing. Sensing what is happening in our heart, in our environment, and in the hearts of others is a profound gift.
Each layer inward brings us to another level of passion.
Each layer inward allows us to love more deeply, and each trains us in a new level of skill, bravery, and wisdom. And we often need the insight of others to help us decipher our Core Gifts. Creating a relationship with our Core Gifts is the task of a lifetime. Most of us must practice exposing ourselves to our Core Gifts in small doses, gradually increasing our tolerance for their power, their tenderness--and their immense challenge. Our deepest gifts can grow and mature, but they can never be domesticated.
They will never fit into the small, safe, well-mannered boxes we create for them. They will continue to draw outside the lines, to get us in trouble, cajole us to the edge of authenticity, cause tears we don't understand, surprise us with their emotion-filled truths.
They are also most resilient in the face of trauma and disaster. If they are also wise enough to choose relationships in which their generosity is appreciated and returned, their lives become profoundly gratifying. If you don't seize the moment and take your date's hand when you feel like it, something is lost.
Saying 'I love you' and touching your partner sexually or sensually in a way that speaks from your deepest heart are both acts of generosity.
And the experience of having someone respond with joy and reciprocation provides a deep sense of mastery for your gifts. I can be generous. I am wanted. I can love. We register that 'rightness' with feelings of peace, gratification, and stability. These are signs that our Core Gifts, those barometers of our very soul, are being honored, seen, and embraced. When things feel wrong, we feel empty, sad, hurting. These are signs that our Core Gifts are somehow not being seen or honored--by others, and quite likely by ourselves.
The places where we feel most broken often don't need to be fixed. What they need is to be heard. As much as most of us want to control our own destiny, the humbling truth is that sometimes the only way to learn self-love is by being loved--precisely in the parts of ourselves where we feel most unsure and tender.
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2 quotes from Deeper Dating: How to Drop the Games of Seduction and Discover the Power of Intimacy: 'Of all the harmful myths we're fed, one of the most. Find books like Deeper Dating: How to Drop the Games of Seduction and Discover the Power of Intimacy from the world's largest community of readers. Goodr. Awkward for me to listen to on audiobook. He has a pleasant voice though. The author does make you think on your relationships and how you.
Want to Read Currently Reading Read. Error rating book. Refresh and try again. Akilah 's review Feb 11, The most helpful chapters to me here were the ones on the attractions of inspiration and deprivation because they honestly helped me learn more about myself and my relationships than most other books I've read. Everything after that was your standard self-help book fare, I thought, so if you're new to self-help, the whole thing will probably be super helpful.
If you're pretty familiar with the genre, it'll be the first half of the book. Also, and I will keep saying this, so many of these books on dating assume that the people reading find it easy to date or have people lining up at their doors. While Page does acknowledge that you may want to practice these skills with friends if you're not currently dating, there is a lack of "and for those of you who don't attract people, here's something for you. It just bugs me is all.