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  • 17.09.2019
  • by Gutilar
  • 3 comments

Ask Dr. NerdLove: How Can I Have More Casual Hookups?

Reddit Hookup Success - Post Update- Q&A - AMA - Live Stream Ep 3

It has two main sections, how to hookup when you are on your Tinder date, and how to use Tinder to get laid. Guys want to hookup and have sex with hot, sexy attractive women but sadly most men have no idea of how to make that happen, especially on Tinder, if you have ever seen the Tinder messages girls get — its embarrassing for all men. Tinder or non Tinder — this is important. If a girl starts suggesting that she would be up for a one night stand and sounding like a slut, 9 out of 10 times they are just testing you. For girls it is all about the story, of how it happened, girls love this stuff and will chat hours with their friends; what did he say? How did he ask you out?

How did this idea take hold? Well, some apps are deliberately vague about their purpose, trying to be all things for all people.

Successful hookup

Tinder, one of the most popular dating apps, is a great example: some people swipe for short-term fun, while others use it to look for love. To solve that problem, some apps have decided to specialize, so, for example, Bumble is known as a female-friendly relationship app, while other apps are more deliberately targeted towards short-term flings.

Of course, you'll want to be using the right dating app to get the job done. Luckily, you're looking for a casual encounter at a time when new apps and features are constantly evolving to help you find exactly what it is you're looking for.

Not sure which apps to start with? We've put together a list of some of the best dating apps for hooking up, as well as our advice on how to use them to your advantage to get lucky tonight. When you're using apps to find a local hookup, there are a few ground rules to keep in mind that will set you up for success in the long run.

Looking to have fun tonight! Dating sites work much better if your match knows what you're looking for, and you're not being misleading. As for how to approach potential hookup partners you've matched with, transparency and manners are important, as always. Hacke also recommends testing the waters before proposing a hookup. You can gradually escalate the nature of your flirting until you've advanced to sexual innuendo.

At that point, if she still seems interested, you've got a green light of sorts to attempt to initiate a hookup. Before there were dating apps, there was OkCupid. What makes the dating app especially great for finding hookups is the search functionality, hands down. While apps like Tinder and Bumble only allow you to filter by location and age, OkCupid lets you search using keywords found on profiles.

In other words, you can see who's looking for something casual, or type in phrases like "not looking for anything serious. This is one of the app store's most popular dating apps for a reason. Check out OkCupid. If you don't have the patience to weed out matches that are explicitly looking for a no strings attached hookup, a quick search on FriendFinder-X will probably make you pretty happy.

You can search for potential matches using filters that range from proximity, sexual preferences and even cup size. Too lazy to search? The app has a list of compatible profiles sent to you for your consideration. Check out FriendFinder-X. One of the oldest, largest and most-trusted hookup sites on the internet, Adult FriendFinder should be on everyone's short list of hookup apps, first for its massive community of users hey, more users means more options!

Testifying to its effectiveness, the site has won numerous awards, including Best Adult Dating Site in Check out Adult FriendFinder. Finding a willing hookup buddy in your area is undoubtedly a numbers game, and while not everyone on this app is on it for a casual fling, the odds are high that you'll be able to connect with users that are looking for something casual tonight.

Not to mention, it's beyond easy to use. If you both dig each other, you'll be able to send messages to get things started. Check out Tinder. That means you spend more time getting busy and less time exchanging niceties. It is overtly branded as a hookup app, so you know the intentions of whoever you're chatting with without having to play the guessing game.

Not only does this app protect your anonymity by making messages and images self-destruct, but it's also free to download. Note: There is a free version of Clover, but the premium memberships allows for unlimited chatting, plus you'll be able to unlock all photo, video, and badge features.

Paying for an app is annoying, but Clover's impressive 4.

How to Have a Successful Hookup Roster

Our main point? Sometimes it's nice to not be strangers with the person you're having sex with.

A lot of hookups usually end in being kicked out of bed at 3 a. It's nice to know you can hold some sort of conversation and use them for their company as well as their private parts.

When you're using apps to find a local hookup, there are a few ground rules to keep in mind that will set you up for success in the long run. Tinder may be getting press for being a hookup hotspot, but there are The League is an exclusive dating app for smart, successful people. Hookup culture can be intimidating and toxic—but it doesn't have to be.

You can easily get laid and find a a no-strings-attached situation, just with a friendlier dynamic. Does that take the passion and mystery and spontaneity of a random hookup away?

Tinder Hookup, sex on the first night, ready for some tips and date This framework is perfect when it comes to having a successful date, follow. After hearing from many of Down's users and having some escapades of my own, here are the 3 simple steps to a successful hookup. This is your quick guide. We considered visibility, popularity with singles, ease of use, lifestyle, and success rate with matches to find the ones that matter to single men.

Hell no. Plus, if you're also open to a relationship if you meet the right person, Clover is a great happy medium. Best for queer women. HER Ideal for queer women who are tired of heteronormative dating sites and finding the same three lesbians on Tinder.

Apps like Tinder and Bumble are technically for all sexual orientations — so why are they still giving you male matches when you've specified you only want women? Swiping through all of that is way too much work, and it shouldn't have to be like that. Claiming to the be the app that "introduces you to every lesbian you've ever wanted to meet," HER is the award-winning mix of dating and social media that lets you meet girls you know are girls, as it requires a Facebook for signup and is solely for lesbian, bisexual, and queer women.

It was also created by queer women, for queer women, which is glorious. It's nice to have genuine options that aren't just straight girls on Tinder looking to make friends or find a threesome partner. A hookup app for lesbians that's not completely sexualized by straight men? Is this real life? However, HER is so much more than a hookup app, and doesn't even put on the pressure to find a romantic partner.

See our other picks for the best dating sites for lesbians here and sign up for HER for free here. Best for finding a sexting partner. Image: Pixabay. One of the main differences between iHookup and the numerous other sites used for hookups is that your feed won't make you feel like you've been violated.

Members actually post pictures of their faces instead of their nether regions and put effort into their profiles. It's a really nice change of pace for people who are in the mood, but not so in the mood that they need porn shoved in their face.

It's still X-rated though, don't you worry — you'll realize that when you're bombarded by gross ads. On the downside, the website is more of a Facebook for horny people than an all-encompassing hookup site.

Women who're up for a casual hook-up aren't necessarily going to be . a hook- up in a dingy club bathroom, but you'll have a better success.

There aren't nearly as many ways to get involved with other horny members, and that might just be because the user base simply isn't as big.

However, give it a year or two and we wouldn't be surprised if it competed with the ranks of eharmony. Read our full review of iHookup here. It seems kind of pricey for a site that hasn't yet made it's mark on the world, but they guarantee that if you don't get a hookup in your first three months, they'll give you three months for free. Because the member base isn't as robust and is more spread out geographically, you might want to be a little more lenient with your mile radius when it comes to the matches they suggest.

You'll probably be able to find a nearby hookup, but iHookup is a way better place for someone looking for a cute sexting partner from another country. Check out our full review of iHookup here and sign up here.

The hookup lifestyle is huge and generally accepted amongst most. quick tips on having a successful hookup roster from a girl's perspective. 'Knowing what you want and being honest about this with potential partners is the key to success' (Picture: Ella Byworth for finishthetrail.com). The best hookup apps for those looking for something casual, from AdultFriendFinder to iHookup to Tinder and beyond.

Best for swingers. Image: pexels. Couples spicing things up with the help of another couple is way more common than people think, despite what Tinder may lead you to believe.

When you advertise as a swinger on such a mainstream app, most of the bites you'll get are people looking for a threesome or people who don't quite understand the "partner swapping" concept. If you're tired of explaining the setup you want, it's time to make the switch to a site devoted to swinging.

Opt for 99 Flavors, where everyone knows what's up and isn't afraid to make the first move. Signing up as a couple has its benefits: The other users instantly know who's involved and if it's something they're interested in, both of you can search for partners, and both of you can participate in video chats and sexting. Sign-up is quick, with simple questions like sexual orientation.

But be warned: Once you confirm your email address and choose a subscription plan, you will see genitals everywhere. Member profiles can be extremely detailed and there are about 93 million active profiles, so finding a match that's down for whatever won't take long — no matter what time it is. You can use the instant message function, exchange photos and videos, video chat, or save the dirty stuff for a meet-up IRL.

Best for BDSM hookups. Image: pixabay. At some point, even iHookups and AdultFriendFinder can start to feel bland. If Rihanna iconic line about chains and whips speaks to you, then you may consider taking a ride on ALT. A self-proclaimed "BDSM, fetish, and kink site," ALT is one of the rare sites that's dedicated to bondage, erotic role play, and a whole lotta leather.

Quick sign-up questions about gender, sexual orientation, and whether you're dominant or submissive come first, but the actual questionnaire is pretty lengthy for a site that's only fostering quick connections.

The Best Apps For One-Night Stands

However, those with very specific predilections will appreciate this attention to detail. What's so nice about ALT is that it gives you the chance to find a quick hookup or just meet new people who are into the same stuff you are — without having to worry that you'll be judged. With the ability to interact in private chat networks or create your own blog aside from the expected live video broadcasts and fetish videosyou're guaranteed to at least come away with some advice or a list of new handcuffs to try.

It's true that most people care more about the hookups they get out of a site than the site's aesthetic itself — but it turns into a problem when the site's design is so messy that it becomes difficult to navigate. ALT is a landfill of profiles, blogs, videos, and the occasional animated porn ad. It really is an impressive wealth of content, but the user-friendliness could be a turnoff for some.

Best for men who hate Grindr. Gay Friend Finder You won't find a hookup within the hour, but this is a solid alternative for those who feel Grindr is too impersonal. Aren't you glad to not see Grindr listed as the go-to for gay guys? Grindr's massive user base and focus on finding local hookups make it almost untouchable, but the lack of profile details and impersonal conversations get old fast.

Just because you're looking for a hookup does not mean that you want to be greeted with a dick pic. Gay Friend Finder is a slightly outdated but much slower-paced alternative for gay men who want to hook up, but still like to see a profile with some personality. Unlike Grindr, which has at least five matches for you at any given time of the day, Gay Friend Finder's user base is a bit of a desert. With an active user base of under 50, men, don't get your hopes up about an immediate hookup.

However, the small circle of men who do have profiles are mature the majority are 30 or olderand may be more likely to want an ongoing friends-with-benefits thing than a mindless booty call.

It's a good thing there aren't many users to fish through, because filtering options are almost non-existent. For a site that's lacking in numbers, community is huge on Gay Friend Finder.

Relatively in-depth user profiles, a collection of original blogs, and ways to interact other than private messaging give users a chance to bond with other gay men in a way that strictly hookup-oriented sites don't bother with.

But don't worry — there's still plenty of heart rate-raising material here. Best for video hookups. Chat with real models in HD and test out Bluetooth sex toys.

From teledildonics to customization tools to nearly limitless HD video chat, this is the site to visit if you're thinking about switching from porn to live streams.

Cam sites get a pretty bad rep around these parts.

TINDER PICK UP LINES THAT ACTUALLY WORK

Thanks to the myriad of obnoxious clips on Pornhub and sites that steal your credit card info for shitty ripoff videos, the search for a reliable cams site may seem bleak. Instead of paying for a monthly membership, you have to buy tokens to do much of anything. It seems like much more of a hassle than paying for a monthly membership, but the token currency allows you to tip models, buy sex toys directly from the site, and pay for private shows.

Despite the fact that there's obviously a screen between you and the other person, Cams. The assortment of HD live streams isn't even the best part here, and that's saying something. Order a toy through LoveSense or OhMiBoddownload the app, and let the model control the vibrations almost as if you were there. It's basically a one-night stand without even leaving the house. Best for people who don't know what they want. Ever heard of "behavioral matchmaking? Zoosk sports a flirty "pick up and go" philosophy when it comes to online dating, so they won't make you answer a torturous string of questions about yourself.

Instead, Zoosk monitors your on-site activity and attempts to give you better matches based on what you already like. Zoosk offers ease and practicality and is pretty far from the Tinders of the world.

Specifying the age range and gender that you're looking for in a partner does squat to narrow down your options. That might be fine for a strict hookup, but finding something past friends with benefits will require a little more help. Considering Zoosk sees a user base of about 40 million members, getting through all profiles that match your requirements could take ages.

By monitoring your swiping behavior, Zoosk can tap into your subconscious okay, not really, but sorta and give you what you want deep down, even if you don't even know why you're saying yes or no to those profiles. There is one downside we need to mention, though: The amount of fake or dead profiles makes this place seem like the dating site version of The Walking Dead.

Of course, all dating sites have their fair share of duds, but Zoosk is just feeling that plague a bit more intensely we've heard it's mostly female profiles. Luckily, you can weed these out by looking for a "Currently online" or "Recently online" status. It's not wildly pricey, and as with any dating site that you need to pay for, it's kind of nice to know that other users are somewhat serious if they're spending their money on it.

Zoosk also has a coin system that allows you to boost your profile and get access to other special features, which you can read about in our full review here. Best combo of fun and seriousness. Psst, people who are over Tinder but not yet ready to join the ranks of marriage-crazed eHarmony : OkCupid is your new best friend. This hip, LGBT-friendly site has won the hearts of millennial and mature singles alike, and we'd give it the crown for being the smartest combo of spontaneous and serious.

It's the place for, well, pretty much everyone who takes dating seriously, but still wants to have fun. Here's the thing about OkCupid: Their advertising is outstanding. They deserve endless applause just for that, but I realize many people on dating apps care about more than the aesthetics.

Though OkCupid's advertisements may have "DTF" plastered all over them, the site's intentions and matchmaking process are no joke. The site takes compatibility factors into account that other sites haven't even thought of. First things first: OkCupid and its user base is pretty liberal which can also translate into "sex positive". The ads with same-sex couples are an obvious giveaway, but OkCupid has snuck in other little features to weed out more conservative-minded people. This can help you avoid awkward date conversations in the future.

Other sites don't go into this type of stuff much past religion, but with politics being more of a hot topic now than ever, you can imagine how torturous it would be to end up with someone who starts an argument with you every time the news is on. It might take some time and genuine effort to make a profile, but that's what you want if you're looking for something real. You'll fill out a questionnaire with your answers as well as what you would like your ideal match to answer.

This makes the application-building process a lot more fun than other apps, making it feel like an online quiz. It asks a range of questions, from simple stuff to if you smoke and drink to more intimate things like how many dates you typically wait before sleeping with someone.

Pro tip: The app says the the more questions you answer, the better your matches will be. The deeper you go, the more accurate your profile is — and in turn, OkCupid will have a way easier time finding matches for you. The downside? This question answering can get tedious AF. You can for sure find a hookup here eventually, but don't come here looking to find a good lay within a few hours.

Read our full review here. Best for finding long-term commitment.

Tami

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